goodbye first love

i fell in love.and that is a crime.because ive hurt the second most important person in my life.i am flawed.

i have always loved you.you were my soul, the reason why i woke up smiling each morning.you came close to perfect.

your laugh,your touch, your smile.they are magical.they could still make my heart flip.

it kills me to do this to you.but i couldnt lie to myself.and you.you deserve to be happy.i love you.always will.

be happy rahime.

the beginning of the end..

i am in need of something to hold on to.because i dont even know if what i believe in before this will work this out the way i want to.

you will never forgive me for this.but this is something i have to do on my own.i will not hear your voices anymore.i will hear mine for a change.

i hope you will be happy in the future.

waiting

i wanted so badly to believe what you told me.each day the belief diminish, until what is left is only a tinge of hope that what you said might come true.

i dont know if i can wait anymore.

accreditation

had the chance to bitch about the lecturers..but didnt...

damn..i missed the cue!

*but i guess that wouldve been ungrateful,seeing that i have become a learned person, as compared to myself 3 years ago.

night out for lala

4 girls of different backgorund, personalities and lifestyle.
somehow shares a strong bond that is just to difficult to describe in words.

and a flat tyre.

thanks girls.you guys really made my day :)

from the play "how i learned to drive"

the other day i watched a play about an 11 year old girl who was sexually abused by her uncle. he loved her too much, and she actually accepted it in a sort of twisted way...Pravin(Ashaari's friend) said it takes two to tango..in this play maybe, but in real life, that's just plain bullshit. little girls arent even aware of their sexual attraction until they get boobs and menstruate.and it is kinda sad that things like these do happen in reality.

i was a victim.so many times.i wanted to put a blank page everytime i came around to this chapter of my life.but i couldnt.because it did happen.and there was no way i could erase it.i kept thinking that if i voiced out, others will get hurt by it.and it was a painful lesson to learn that i cant please everyone, because in the end, i had to pay the price.

lesson learned.keeping your mouth shut is definitely not the best idea.

sad phase should be replaced soon

i dont want to cry anymore
i want to stop crying
crying are for babies

she needs to know this

syaza needs to grow up.she needs to know that she should stop blaming everyone else for her unhappiness.she needs to know that life does not wait for cowards like her.she should stop hoping for things that will never come true.

maybe this is the time for you to fade away.

your deal

i dont think i will ever fit into the qualifications you've ste upon me.sometimes it hurts knowing that you will never be happy with who i am.sometimes the question of whether if this is worth the wait crept in, but it usually is overcome by my belief that our fate is indeed intertwined.

i guess im having a hard time accepting the fact that is shoved into my face.you will never be happy with me.

what??

beats me to know what you're thinking.im not a freaking psychic.

batting cage day

day out with no definite location in mind.wandering aimlessly and finally to the batting cage.

i bruised my finger, had an aching back for days, and i guess i actually had fun hitting the balls :)